339. Begin Again (2014)

August 29, 2014

It was date night and we had a free pass to see 'Begin Again', so my wife and I went to see it. It wasn't terrible. I'll admit, I'm not a big fan of Kiera Knightley. She has been in a couple movies that I thought were OK (like this one), but I just don't think she is very good. I do love Mark Ruffalo, though, and he is definitely what saved this movie. Ruffalo plays a record label executive who gets fired by his partner (Mos Def) and goes on to work on his own projects. He finds an aspiring artist in Knightley who, after a bad breakup with a pretentious pop singer, joins up with Ruffalo and creates an album based on the sounds of the city (meaning they recorded their songs outside in different places of the city with all the cars and people and other noises that accompany those places becoming part of the tracks). Much to the chagrin of Mos Def who found it in himself to hire Ruffalo back, the album was a huge success, but Knightley didn't want to be so pretentious, so she released her album free of charge online. It was an alright movie, but I doubt that I would ever watch it again.

338. The Abomination (1986)

August 26, 2014

Another one of the Alamo Drafthouse's Video Vortex series, 'The Abomination' was worth every penny of the $1 price of admission. With my friends Joe, Jennifer, and Davis, we set out together to watch this long lost obscurity. I have to admit the main reason I wanted to see it was after reading Joseph Ziemba's hunt to find The Abomination on Bleeding Skull, and finding out that my life actually depended on seeing this film. The beginning of the movie shows all of the money shots from the rest of the movie as part of the main character's nightmare. Then the rest of the movie slowly explains the things you've already seen in agonizingly drawn-out scenes. After hanging on every word of a televangelist, a young man's mother spits up a tumor that grows and splits into more tumors that eventually take over the kitchen. The man gets infected and starts killing people to feed the tumor's need to devour flesh. That is basically the entire plot. It could have been a fun short film but they had to drag it out and show the same scenes over and over to make it a feature length film. There were several long scenes of cars driving and people running. I'm glad I got a chance to see it, but I don't think it would be worth recommending to anyone I know. In order to make this review longer, I'm going to employ some of the techniques I learned from watching 'The Abomination'. The beginning of the movie shows all of the money shots from the rest of the movie as part of the main character's nightmare. Then the rest of the movie slowly explains the things you've already seen in agonizingly drawn-out scenes. Is the movie over yet? NO! The beginning of the movie shows all of the money shots from the rest of the movie as part of the main character's nightmare. OK, for your sake I'll end it here. Nope, still going. After hanging on every word of a televangelist, a young man's mother spits up a tumor that grows and splits into more tumors that eventually take over the kitchen. End.

337. Lust For Freedom (1987)

August 24, 2014

Somehow I missed the Troma release of 'Lust for Freedom', and hadn't heard of this movie until I saw the Vinegar Syndrome trailer and knew that I had to see it. I think it was Grim Reaper's theme song that sold me. No, I know it was. So, in the movie, a girl gets thrown in jail for no reason by some crooked cops and once inside she meets a bunch of other innocent girls. They concoct a plan to bust out, and spend most of their time organizing and getting things just right for their big break. This movie would have probably been really good, had it not been for the abysmal voice over that took place throughout the entire movie. Oh well, it still had some enjoyable moments. I don't really recommend it though.

336. Sharknado 2: The Second One (2014)

August 24, 2014

Not part of a 'bad movie night', but a terrible movie nonetheless, 'Sharknado 2 The Second One' was destined to be trash long before it was even an idea. After the success of 'Sharknado', SyFy decided to cash in on the franchise in a big way. Enlisting the help of far too many Hollywood b and c-list celebrities and talk show hosts, and utilizing the worst in what CGI has to offer, 'Sharknado 2 The Second One' did exactly what it set out to do: Capitalize on a dumb idea that people like me are dumb enough to pay to see. It had some funny moments, but it didn't have the heart of the first one, and it was way too self-aware for my tastes. What it did have, however, was a plethora of sharks flying around in tornadoes, wreaking havoc on everything in sight. If that doesn't get you excited, you're probably dead. If you've managed to avoid the first one, steer clear of this one and you'll be OK. Otherwise, if you're like me and you've seen both of them so far, you'll be watching every stupid second of Sharknado 3 when it rolls in.

335. Undefeatable (1993)

August 23, 2014

The final film of the night was Godfrey Ho's 'Undefeatable'. As was to be expected, it was terrible, but delightful. After Stingray, a lunatic with mommy issues, rapes his wife and she leaves him, he goes on a rampage, kidnapping and killing all women who look like his wife (turns out there were quite a few women in town who fit that bill). When a talented street fighter (Cynthia Rothrock) loses her sister to the deranged maniac, she makes it her mission to find him and bring him down. A cop who keeps bringing Rothrock in for fighting and disturbing the peace enlists her to fight her way to Stingray. That cop also knows martial arts. In fact, I'm reasonably sure everyone in this film except for the women who looked like Stingray's wife (wait, even one of them had some moves) and some high school jocks were martial arts experts. That is a surprising amount of people in such a condensed area when you consider how many people you actually know who have mastered any martial arts (aside from getting a black belt in Karate in middle school). Doesn't matter. The script called for a town full of kung fu fighters, and that is what they got. It was the apposite ending to another fabulous bad movie night!

334. Samurai Cop (1991)

August 23, 2014

If you're a fan of bad movies, 'Samurai Cop' is the quintessential film you absolutely need to see, and it served as the second film of our second bad movie night. One of the finest examples of inept film-making, 'Samurai Cop' is so bad in almost every way, from the awful script to the silly soundtrack to the horrendous acting. Matt Hannon stars as Joe Marshall, and despite the fact that several people refer to him as the person who is called Samurai Cop, nobody actually ever calls him Samurai Cop and he is definitely not a samurai (although they did get the cop part right). The movie begins with a car chase, involving a helicopter that is clearly nowhere near any action and doesn't seem like it is even moving, yet the pilot can see all the action, and she is able to communicate all the details to Marshall without a radio. Once the chase is finished, Marshall and the helicopter pilot make love with their panties on. Robert Z'Dar and some other bad guys show up and ... Jesus, I've seen this movie three times now and I can't honestly tell you what happens. What I do know is this - Z'Dar and Hannon have one major fight in several locations, with Hannon's long, flowing wig occasionally coming detached, and there are a few more scenes of passionate romance including one where Z'Dar looks like he is trying to eat a girl's face. Almost everybody dies, but Hannon and his partner will be back for the long-awaited (24 years) sequel, 'Samurai Cop 2: Deadly Vengeance'. You can even be a part of the magic, if you want! Just head over to their Kickstarter page and donate all of your hard-earned cash!

333. Enter the Ninja (1981)

August 23, 2014

The Bad Movie Club's second bad movie night triple feature was another unmitigated success. It was a ninja-themed night, complete with samurai swords, good friends, good food, and bad movies. We kicked off the evening with Menahem Golan's campy cult classic, 'Enter the Ninja', an epic tale of a war veteran (Franco Nero) trained in the art of ninjutsu who goes to live with his friends in the Philippines only to find them and their village threatened by an evil businessman (Christopher George) who will stop at nothing to buy their land. Nero sleeps with his friend's wife (Susan George) to no ill consequences, and George eventually gets himself a ninja (Sho Kosugi), who just so happens to be Nero's arch-nemesis from his training days, and then it's on. A disproportionate amount of people die for this small piece of land, but I guess it's all worth it in the end when Nero and Kosugi meet for their monumental final battle. Sounds pretty awesome, right? It was a lot of fun, and totally worth watching just for Christopher George's ridiculous, over-the-top acting, as well as for the added bonus of seeing the grandpa from 'Silent Night Deadly Night' (Will Hare) as one of Nero's friends.

332. The Fisher King (1991)

August 23, 2014

It still doesn't seem real that Robin Williams is gone. He was one of the most talented and beloved actors of this or any generation and losing him was like losing a close friend. I couldn't bring myself to watch any of his movies until now (he passed on August 11), and Terry Gilliam's brilliant film, 'The Fisher King', seemed like a fitting film to watch under the circumstances. Williams plays a disturbed vagrant with delusions of a black knight chasing him on his quest to obtain the holy grail. Jeff Bridges plays a radio disc jockey who unintentionally advised a lunatic over the phone to gun down a bunch of people in an upscale restaurant. Plagued with guilt, Bridges quit his job and started working at a video rental store. One night after some heavy drinking, Bridges found himself contemplating suicide only to be attacked by some kids on the street. Williams came to his rescue and the two became inextricably linked when Bridges found out the reason for Williams' mental issues - his wife was one of those killed by the madman on the phone. Feeling responsible for getting Williams back to reality, Bridges did his best to help him, even going a little mad in the process. 'The Fisher King' is a classic that should be celebrated more than it is. I highly recommend it.

331. Super (2010)

August 22, 2014

'Super' is another movie I've also recently reviewed on this blog. My friend Jared came over and we watched 'Super' and 'Maniac' as a double header. Another highly recommended movie (and the reason I don't dislike Ellen Page anymore). Recommended for fans of James Gunn movies (pretty sure that includes everyone now), so check it out!

330. Maniac (2012)

August 22, 2014

I think I've already watched and reviewed this movie twice on this blog, so I'll spare you the details this time. Suffice to say it is an amazing movie that you should see. It is a deeply disturbed movie, which makes it all the better, and Elijah Wood plays the titular maniac to perfection. You should also check out William Lustig's original classic starring Joe Spinell.