June 2014 Recap

Here's my top 5 and bottom 5 for June, 2014 (once again, a reminder that my top and bottom of the month only include films that were new to me):

My top 5 (in no particular order):
1. Just Before Dawn
2. Mary, Mary, Bloody Mary
3. Super
4. Kill List
5. Sorcerer
Runner Up: Enemy, Borgman

The bottom 5 (in no particular order)
1. Vampire Academy
2. The Dead Are Alive
3. Night Train to Terror
4. Cottage Country
5. The Man With One Red Shoe
Runner Up: The Nostril Picker, Split Second

289. Detroit 9000 (1973)

June 30, 2014

I was expecting 'Detroit 9000' to be a raucous and wild blaxploitation extravaganza but I have to admit I was a little underwhelmed. When thieves broke in to a fundraiser for a corrupt politician and stole hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of jewelry and cash from the attendees, it was up to a couple cops to solve the crime and get to the bottom of a major political scandal without succumbing to the greed and power of the extremely wealthy. It wasn't by any means a bad movie, in fact it was actually pretty good, but it just wasn't what I was hoping for and therefore left me slightly disinterested.

288. House of 1000 Corpses (2003)

June 29, 2014

I'm not the world's biggest Rob Zombie fan, but I'd say 'House of 1000 Corpses' is probably my favorite of all of his movies. This movie never takes itself too seriously, and proudly pays homage to grindhouse and slasher films of the 70s and 80s. It features a van full of college kids on a road trip when they stumble into a museum of horrible things, run by Captain Spaulding (Sid Haig) who takes them on a murder tour and sends them on their way. Then they pick up a hitchhiker (Rob Zombie's wife, Sheri Moon Zombie) who takes them to her hillbilly house of pain where her crazy family (including Bill Moseley, Karen Black, and Michael Pollard) torture their new guests to no end, leaving the lucky ones to die quickly. It's fun in a totally low-brow, absurd way, and only for fans of blood-drenched horror-comedy films with the blackest sense of humor possible.

287. Sorcerer (1977)

June 28, 2014

William Friedkin's feature film follow-up to 'The Exorcist', 'Sorcerer', was nothing like what I expected. It followed four guys who had either made bad decisions or had just been unlucky and wound up in financial ruin. All four of them ended up in the South American jungle, transporting truckloads of nitroglycerin across treacherous terrain and through virulent weather with the incessant threat of inescapable doom all around them. Everything that could possibly go wrong did go wrong for these people. There wasn't a lot to the plot, just some guys trying to get from point A to point B without dying, but the cinematic style and the nail-biting suspense made 'Sorcerer' a truly impressive film that needs to be seen.

286. Borgman (2013)

June 28, 2014

The Dutch film 'Borgman' was pretty weird, especially since I watched it without subtitles. I got the gist of it, though, I think. A group of vagrants who live in holes underground get forced out of their holes and try to mix with society. One of the vagrants, Borgman, kills a gardener and replaces him as a family's gardener. He doesn't do much gardening, instead he infiltrates the family's home and slowly drives everyone to madness. I'm very much interested in watching it again, this time with subtitles, to get a better grip of what was going on, but it was visually very intriguing.

285. Escape Plan (2013)

June 26, 2014

In 'Escape Plan', Sylvester Stallone plays a guy who gets paid to break out of prisons. He is the best escape artist imaginable, and he uses some of the most bizarre and far-fetched tricks to break out of even the toughest institutions. When he gets taken to the most ridiculously high security prison ever built with no idea of where he is or how he got there, he teams up with fellow inmate Arnold Schwarzenegger to figure out a way to break free. It is as absurd as it sounds, and is really only worth watching for fans of the aged action heroes just to say they've seen it. It doesn't bring much more than that to the table, but that doesn't really matter much. You know what you're getting into, so it is easy to suspend your disbelief and just enjoy it.

284. No Escape (1994)

June 25, 2014

Another recommendation from my friend Jason, 'No Escape' stars Ray Liotta as a convicted murderer sent to a high-security prison. His disrespect for authority leads to the warden sending him to a no-security island inhabited by psychos who kill for fun. Liotta manages to get away from the craziest of the crazies and winds up in a camp of semi-normal people where he becomes friends with Ernie Hudson and Lance Henriksen and together they work on figuring out a way off the island. It was also a very silly movie, and it felt a little bit long, but I really had a good time watching it. My wife and I both enjoyed it, so I'd say it is worth watching.

283. Surviving The Game (1994)

June 23, 2014

My friend Jason told me to watch 'Surviving The Game' after I told him about 'Deadly Prey'. It wasn't a terrible movie, although it was a really silly idea. A bunch of rich guys (including Rutger Hauer, Gary Busey, F. Murray Abraham, Charles S. Dutton, and John C. McGinley) hire a homeless man (Ice-T) with no family and no friends to be their guide on a hunting expedition in the mountains. Knowing nothing about hunting or being a guide but willing to take any job he can to try to make some money, Ice-T accepts the position, unaware of the fact that the thing the rich guys are planning on hunting is actually himself, not wildlife. The hunters give Ice-T a head start and then chase him all around the mountainous island trying to kill him, while Ice-T uses his street smarts to stay one step ahead of them. I enjoyed it enough to recommend it.

282. I'm Gonna Git You Sucka (1988)

June 22, 2014

Long before 'Black Dynamite' spoofed the blaxploitation genre, Keenan Ivory Wayans had his shot at it with 'I'm Gonna Git You Sucka'. Both movies are awesome. The cast alone (including Bernie Casey, Isaac Hayes, and Jim Brown, not to mention some of the greatest cameos ever by Chris Rock, David Alan Grier, and the amazing Clarence Williams III) makes 'I'm Gonna Git You Sucka' worth seeing. Wayans stars as a young man on leave from the Army who comes home after the death of his brother, Junebug (he died from an overdose of gold chains), and finds the streets he grew up on are no longer safe. He forms a gang of aging heroes and makes a plan to clean the place up and get revenge against the criminals who killed his brother. This movie is so much fun. If you haven't seen it, do yourself a favor and check it out. Chris Rock's short cameo steals the show (I had to re-watch it several times because I was laughing so hard).

281. Mimic (1997)

June 22, 2014

Guillermo Del Toro's creepy giant bug movie 'Mimic' was pretty entertaining. Mira Sorvino stars as an entomologist with a slightly disturbing bug obsession. When she unleashes a genetically engineered, cannibalistic super-cockroach in the sewers with the intention being to cull the cockroach population in the city, things go pretty smooth for a while. Fast forward a few years and people start dying in the subways. With the help of an autistic little boy, a cop, and a couple other scientists, Sorvino figures out that the killer is actually the progeny of her creation and it has evolved to enormous size and strength. The creature now craves human flesh instead of other bugs. It is up to the motley gang of giant insect hunters to track down and kill the creature before it is too late. If you're easily creeped out by bugs (especially big ones that can kill you), skip this one. Otherwise check it out, it is really good.

280. Just Before Dawn (1981)

June 22, 2014

It is easy to get tired of all the slasher films of the late 70s/early 80s that featured kids in the woods having sex and getting killed, but this movie stands out from the pack as something special. 'Just Before Dawn' follows a group of college kids driving up a mountain to get to a property one of them inherited. George Kennedy plays the foreboding harbinger/forest ranger whose warnings to turn back are willfully ignored by the kids. Once they get as far up the mountain as they can drive, they set up camp and start to realize that they are not the only ones up there. With a fantastic atmosphere that keeps you on the edge of your seat and begging for more, 'Just Before Dawn' is a movie that shouldn't be missed. It is a shame that it isn't well known, but it does have somewhat of a cult following, apparently.

279. Vampire Academy (2014)

June 21, 2014

On par with 'I, Frankenstein', 'Vampire Academy' stands strong in the running for worst movie of 2014. Every scene was a blatant rip-off of other movies, from Harry Potter to Twilight. 'Vampire Academy' was so terrible I would suggest avoiding it at all costs. Should you happen to watch this movie and enjoy it, I would advise seeking immediate help from a psychiatrist.

278. Love at First Bite (1979)

June 21, 2014

George Hamilton stars in this silly, romantic, vampire comedy that wasn't very funny. I didn't dislike it, I was just bored by it. Hamilton plays Count Dracula, who is forced out of his Transylvanian home by the Romanian government. He ends up in New York City, where his cultural differences serve as the basis for most of the intended humor. When he meets the girl of his dreams, who bears a striking resemblance to his beloved Mina Harker, he pursues her tirelessly. Dracula's constant presence irritates the girl's psychiatrist/boyfriend to no end, and he spends the rest of the movie trying to expose/kill the lovelorn vampire. I don't recommend watching or not watching this movie. If it sounds good to you and you want to watch it, have fun. I hope you enjoy it. Unfortunately, I didn't find it interesting.

277. Dead Before Dawn (2012)

June 20, 2014

I'll admit I had some doubts about 'Dead Before Dawn' before I watched it, but it ended up being a decent movie. Honestly I just wanted to watch it because Christopher Lloyd was in it (even though he wasn't in it very much). Lloyd ran an antique shop filled with creepy old artifacts including a skull that held an ancient curse. After Lloyd's son was killed by the curse and his grandson saw it happen, the grandson swore to never again step foot in the building. One day Lloyd was given an award and needed the grandson to watch the shop for him. Reluctantly he did and as fate would have it things went wrong, as they do. The kid and his friends unwittingly unleashed the curse on their small town and had to figure out a way to stop it before dawn when the curse would become permanent. Like I said, it was pretty decent. It wasn't the best movie I've seen in a while, but it was far from the worst, and I'd recommend giving it a watch. I saw it on Netflix instant, so if you have Netflix you can watch it streaming, for now.

276. Humanoids From The Deep (aka The Monster) (1980)

June 19, 2014

In this Roger Corman produced classic, genetic experiments involving salmon treated with a growth hormone have gone awry creating human sized fish monsters with a knack for terrorizing the good people of California. Not only are they savage killing machines, they are also incessantly horny and have an insatiable appetite for sex with human women. So they go around raping and pillaging and some people try to stop them. 'Humanoids From The Deep' was loads of fun and I would highly recommend it. Despite the film's undeniably misogynistic creatures (for what it's worth, it was directed by a woman, Barbara Peeters) and a shoestring budget at best, the film was fun and had some great special effects. If you haven't seen it, go pick up a copy - it is on DVD from Shout! Factory as part of their Roger Corman's Cult Classics line, and it is worth every penny you pay for it.

275. The Nostril Picker (1993)

June 17, 2014

I'm not sure how I feel about this movie. It was intentionally awful, which I'm fine with, but I'm definitely not comfortable with parts the plot. A creepy old man tries hitting on a young school girl who tells him to get lost, and then a homeless guy teaches the creepy guy how to change his form so he can get with the girls. He changes his form into a teenage girl and goes to high school where he can be as perverted as he wants and not get caught. Oh, and he kills people too. Whenever he gets a little horny, instead of having sex with the girls, he just kills them. Police investigate but have no leads until the man's true identity is discovered on tape and the homeless man comes forward and convinces the cops of his powers. I can't recommend this and feel good about it, so I'll just say watch it if you're curious, but if you read that and felt the least bit uncomfortable, skip it.

274. Split Second (1992)

June 15, 2014

Set in the distant future of 2008, Split Second was a mediocre movie that had a lot of potential and very little pay-off. Rutger Hauer starred as a tired cop who was still investigating the death of his partner several years prior. In stereotypical cop-movie fashion, the rugged Hauer was assigned a new partner he didn't want and together they hunted down a serial killer they knew nothing about. When the killer kidnapped Hauer's girlfriend (Kim Cattrall), the detectives followed some clues they found which led them to the killer's lair and they realized their murderer was something not-quite-human. I suppose this movie was worth watching once, but I don't think I would watch it again.

273. The A-Team (2010)

June 15, 2014

I was pleasantly surprised by 'The A-Team.' It was considerably better than I think anyone would've imagined. I never watched the TV show, so the only expectations I had were from the goofy poster and trailer. My friend Austin told me to watch it, and I'm glad he did because it was a lot of fun. It was about a covert team of Army Rangers who were framed for a crime they didn't commit and had to break out of jail and clear their names. All four members of the A-Team (Bradley Cooper, Quinton "Rampage" Jackson, Liam Neeson, and Sharlto Copley) were fantastic and worked great together. I would definitely recommend it for a fun action film.

272. Man's Best Friend (1993)

June 14, 2014

Bent on exposing the dirty secrets of an animal testing lab, a reporter (Ally Sheedy) breaks in and accidentally releases a genetically mutated dog with a penchant for killing humans. The doctor that runs the lab (Lance Henriksen) tries desperately to get the dog back before it turns into a full on killing machine. Meanwhile, Sheedy takes the dog home and tries to make it her pet. The dog seems to love her but treats everyone else like fair game and it keeps getting angrier. I don't really recommend it. It was a little on the boring side. Henriksen was great, as always, but he wasn't in it enough to make the movie worthwhile.

271. Seeking Justice (2011)

June 14, 2014

After Nicolas Cage's wife (January Jones) is brutally attacked, Cage is approached by a secret vigilante organization that tells him they can bring her assailant to justice if he does something for them in return. He reluctantly agrees and the attacker is almost immediately killed. Life goes back to normal for a while, until Cage is contacted by the organization and forced to do some stuff he really doesn't want to do. It was an alright movie. Mostly it was forgettable, but there were a few parts that were pretty good, and it was ultimately at least watchable.

270. The Dead Are Alive (1972)

June 13, 2014

When you look at the poster art, and you read that title, 'The Dead Are Alive!', what immediately comes to mind? For me it was zombies. Or at least something undead. No dice here. 'The Dead Are Alive!' was essentially a really boring soap opera about some archaeologists digging up ruins in Italy and when people started turning up dead, some of them toyed with the idea that perhaps, along with the ruins they were digging up, they had dug up a curse and were being killed off because of it. Had that been the case, it may have made for a better film. Instead, the movie played out like a tedious and unimaginative Scooby-Doo episode with no real supernatural activity at all. Copies of this one are pretty rare, but even if you do track it down, save yourself the time and energy (unless you just want something to fall asleep to).

269. Brain Damage (1988)

June 13, 2014

I can't tell you how much I love Frank Henenlotter. He is by far my favorite director. In his second feature film, Brain Damage, he explores the topic of drug addiction using a parasitic creature named Aylmer who latches on to people's necks and injects them with a hypnotic, mind-altering fluid in exchange for human sacrifices. The longer the person is exposed to the fluid, the more their tolerance builds up, and the more people they have to kill to feed their creature so it can continue feeding their habit. When Aylmer shows up in Brian's apartment, Brian quickly becomes addicted and unconsciously does Aylmer's bidding. He becomes more reluctant as time goes on and the drug's effects wear off, making him more aware of his surroundings, but it remains difficult to fight his desperate urges. Henenlotter regular Gabriel Bartalos contributed to the awesome makeup and creature design, making Brain Damage an absolute must-see for all horror/b-movie/creature feature fans out there. In fact, just watch all of Henenlotter's movies, because they are all amazing!

268. Scanners (1981)

June 12, 2014

Like most of David Cronenberg's earlier work, Scanners is a true classic. It is about people with telekinetic abilities who can read minds and, when provoked or concentrating too heavily on one person, can blow people's heads up. One of the scanners gets captured by a corporation and thrown in a study where he is drugged and trained to control his abilities so he can stop another scanner who has declared war on that corporation. Definitely worth watching if you haven't seen it.

267. Buddha's Palm (1982)

June 11, 2014

I saw 'Buddha's Palm' under the false pretense that I was going to see a "mystery blaxploitation film" that, according to the description on the Alamo Drafthouse's website, was 'Emma Mae' aka 'Black Sister's Revenge'. Obviously the Alamo Drafthouse decided to show a different movie, and I never asked why. While I was excited to see 'Black Sister's Revenge', I can't say I'm too disappointed. 'Buddha's Palm' was classic Shaw Brothers entertainment. It didn't always make sense, but that didn't matter. Like most of the Shaw Brothers films, there was a lot of magic and fighting with impeccable choreography and bizarre effects. It is definitely worth watching if you like those kinds of movies. I do have to say I really love my wife. I'm a lucky man to be married to someone who would go to a "mystery blaxploitation film" with me and sit through an insane kung-fu movie.

266. Mary, Mary, Bloody Mary (1975)

June 10, 2014

'Mary, Mary, Bloody Mary' was actually really good! It starred the beautiful Cristina Ferrare in her only starring role in film which is a shame because I thought she was fantastic. Everything I've read about this film claimed Mary was a bisexual vampire, but I'm not convinced about either. She was definitely bloodthirsty - she seemed addicted to blood, and she killed a bunch of people to get her fix, but she had no trouble with sunlight and she didn't have sharp teeth or sleep in a coffin or have any other typical vampire features. I don't think she was really bisexual either. She may have occasionally pretended to be, but only in the interest of killing and drinking blood. The most curious thing about the movie was Mary's father, played by John Carradine, who wore a black robe and followed Mary and also had a bizarre thirst for human blood. Directed by Juan Lopez Moctezuma who brought us 'The Mansion of Madness' and the fantastic 'Alucarda', 'Mary, Mary, Bloody Mary' is one I would highly recommend. It came out not long before George Romero's equally wonderful film 'Martin', also about a person who may or may not be a vampire but certainly has a lust for blood, and I would strongly suggest checking both movies out.

265. Night Train to Terror (1985)

June 9, 2014

Well this one was terrible. A bunch of kids singing and dancing to one of the worst songs in any movie are riding a train but don't seem to know or care why or where it is going while god and satan have a debate about souls they've claimed. That is the wrap-around story. God and satan's tales are broken up into short films that have no relevance to anything. I haven't done any research, but I'd be willing to bet they just wanted to make some unrelated short films into a feature so they filmed their ridiculous wrap-around, threw in the short films and called it a movie. Even though I'm a sucker for terrible old horror movies, this one was a little too stupid. Maybe I need to watch it again, but I doubt that will help.

264. Braveheart (1995)

June 8, 2014

Mel Gibson clearly has some demons to deal with, but he is such a good film maker. Braveheart is one of the greatest movies of all time. It is one of the go-to movies my dad and I like to watch together, and this was the first time I think I've actually watched it with anyone else. My wife suggested it and if it had been any other three hour movie I probably would have passed, but I can't pass on this one. I'm not even going to describe it. If you haven't seen Braveheart, you don't care about movies.

263. The Dance of Reality (2013)

June 8, 2014

Alejandro Jodorowsky's first feature film directing gig he has had since the disappointing 'The Rainbow Thief' 23 years ago is an impressive return to form. The Dance of Reality is told as an autobiographical account of his strange youth in Chile. With a lunatic father and a mother who sings every word she says, the young boy in the film was destined for weirdness. He gets himself in and out of trouble in ways only Jodorowsky could portray. It was a beautiful work of art, similar to his early films. If you're unfamiliar with Jodorowsky's work, I would definitely recommend you start with those. Watch 'Fando & Lis' first (it is weird but don't give up!), then move on to the midnight masterpieces 'The Holy Mountain' and 'El Topo', then my personal favorite 'Santa Sangre'.

262. The Dead Next Door (1989)

June 8, 2014

I remember seeing the cover for The Dead Next Door many years ago and thinking it looked cool and then immediately forgetting about it. That is pretty much what happened when I watched the movie. There wasn't enough going on to keep hold of my short attention span, so after it was over I forgot what I just watched. All I can say for sure is that it was a zombie movie with a handful of folks scrambling to find a cure while fighting off the encroaching zombie hordes. Nothing new there. I'm sure some people will appreciate it, particularly die hard zombie movie fans, but it really wasn't that interesting.

261. Deadly Prey (1987)

June 7, 2014

Deadly Prey was another delightfully awful movie that I really enjoyed. It is about a bunch of crazy ex-military people who kidnap unsuspecting innocent people off the streets and let them loose in the woods by their training camp so they can hunt and kill them. They make one big mistake though, when they kidnap Mike Danton, some guy who was the best in Vietnam (and he still is). Clad in just his underwear, Danton manages to kill a bunch of bad guys using whatever he can find as weapons. Everything about this movie was ridiculous, which was awesome. Awesome enough to spawn a sequel 26 years later called Deadliest Prey (I haven't seen it yet but it sounds almost identical to Deadly Prey). Deadly Prey is terrible but watchable, especially with friends!

260. Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987)

June 7, 2014

Hard Ticket to Hawaii is an awful movie with awful acting, awful writing, awful everything, and I had a great time watching it. It is the complete package (it even has a terrible theme song where they keep repeating the name of the movie). The plot supposedly had something to do with the wrong snake being sent to Hawaii and then some ladies accidentally get mixed up in a diamond smuggling scheme when they intercept a toy helicopter that the bad guys were using to get the diamonds from their boat to the shore to the other bad guys. The real plot, in my opinion, was to cram as many dumb ideas and as much bad acting as possible into one horrible movie. It was a success! There was even a cameo by director Andy Sidaris, who proved to be even more incompetent as an actor than he was as a director. This movie had too many hilariously bad scenes to even bother trying to talk about them. I just suggest you go watch this movie. It is cheap and easy to track down as part of Sidaris' "Girls, Guns, and G-Strings" 12 movie collection, and force yourself to watch it.

259. Slithis (aka Spawn of the Slithis) (1978)

June 6, 2014

I'm a sucker for clever movie marketing and gimmicks, so it makes me happy to know that when Slithis was released in theaters they handed out "Slithis Survival Kits" (folded up pieces of pink cardstock) that encouraged people to join the Slithis fan club and promised to keep people safe from the Slithis monster if they slept with the kit under their pillow. Local schools and theaters even had surprise visits from the Slithis monster! For a monster movie made on a shoestring budget, they really went all out and at least had some fun with it. Unfortunately that is about all Slithis has in its favor. The Slithis monster - a genetic mutation caused by nuclear waste accidentally being leaked into a water supply - was pretty cool looking whenever it was on screen, but the movie was really boring. There was way too much talking about things that were so unimportant to the plot that I actually forgot what was going on at times (pretty sad when the entire plot is just some creature killing some animals and humans and then the humans trying to kill that creature). Yet despite its faults, I would still recommend Slithis over a lot of other movies simply for the encouraging feeling that comes from knowing everyone involved probably gave 110% to make this movie happen. It wasn't a run-of-the-mill Hollywood production, obviously. It was a no-budget monster movie made by people who clearly love monster movies, and that to me makes it worth watching.

258. Cottage Country (2013)

June 4, 2014

Clearly trying to cash in on the awesomeness of Tucker and Dale Vs. Evil, Cottage Country stars Tyler Labine in another cabin out in the woods. Only this time, it wasn't so great... This time he was with his girlfriend/soon-to-be-fiancee. The plan was to have a romantic getaway at his parent's cabin that would culminate with him proposing. Instead, his deadbeat brother showed up with his girlfriend and the four of them just fought until Labine accidentally killed him. Not wanting to cancel their plans, Labine's new fiancee helped him dispose of the body and kill the girlfriend and dispose of her too. Then, unbeknownst to the happy, murderous couple, Labine's brother's friends showed up for a party they had planned and were concerned when the hosts weren't there. One guy in particular was a little too concerned, to the point of being annoying, and then the cops got involved and the party-goers had to search for the bodies and other stuff happened but it was all really stupid. Tyler Labine was pretty good, as usual, but everyone else annoyed me.

257. Super (2010)

June 4, 2014

Super was excellent! I believe my opinion on Ellen Page has now been completely turned around because she was so good in this movie. Rainn Wilson played a simple man in love with his wife, Liv Tyler. Tyler was a drug addict who left him for her dealer, Kevin Bacon. Understandably disturbed, Wilson found comfort in a Christian superhero TV show starring Nathan Fillion as the Holy Avenger and took it as a sign from god that he needed to become a superhero to fight crime and get his wife back. Page played a comic store clerk who eventually teamed up with Wilson and helped him tell crime to "Shut up!" It was pretty violent in some places, and very entertaining throughout. I would highly recommend it. For another good ordinary-guy-turned-sort-of-superhero, check out Special with Michael Rapaport.

256. The Man With One Red Shoe (1985)

June 3, 2014

For an 80s movie starring Tom Hanks and a pretty impressive supporting cast including Lori Singer, Edward Herrmann, Tom Noonan, Gerrit Graham, James Belushi, Carrie Fisher, Dabney Coleman, and few others, The Man With One Red Shoe was kind of a letdown. It revolved around a handful of corrupt members of the CIA - the director and his assistant, and the deputy director and his minions. The deputy director wanted to be the director, so he planned to frame the real director for some drug related criminal activity. The director knew about the deputy director's intentions, and he knew that his house had been bugged and that he was constantly under surveillance, so he picked a random guy (Tom Hanks, who happened to be wearing one red shoe) at an airport to be a decoy that the deputy director would think was involved in something. Hanks was a fairly decent guy aside from the fact that he was sleeping with his best friend's wife. It was slow and meandering in places, and I wouldn't really recommend it. Tom Hanks has been in much better movies.

255. Boss Nigger (1975)

June 2, 2014

Fred Williamson and D'Urville Martin take over a small minded town in this hysterical blaxploitation western. On the hunt for some outlaws to capture and turn in dead or alive for a hefty reward, Williamson and Martin find their way to a town where the crooked politicians have pretty much made it a free-for-all for the outlaws to do as they please. It just so happened that before they showed up in town, Williamson found a note from the town's mayor that declared the holder of said note the new town sheriff. With the note in hand, Williamson declared himself sheriff and appointed Martin as his deputy and together they created a list of new town rules which allowed them to throw whoever they wanted in jail and extort random amounts of money from them. It was awesome! There was a semi-interesting side story going on about a girl whose father was killed by the outlaws and then she went to live with the Indians and Williamson fell in love with her. Mostly the movie was just hilariously absurd and absurdly hilarious. I watched it with Libby and my friend Nick and we all loved it.

254. Enemy (2013)

June 1, 2014

Enemy was a very cool movie. I really enjoyed it. Jake Gyllenhaal played two roles - a college professor and an actor. Even though both roles were supposed to be the same person with a split personality disorder, I still prefer to believe he was playing two separate people who were virtually identical. As the college professor, he was quiet and shy and he lived with his girlfriend. When a co-worker suggested a local film for him to watch and he noticed someone in the film who looked identical to himself, he started trying to find out who that person was. He found the guy - an actor with a pregnant wife - and tried to contact him. When they finally met they sort of swapped lives, with very strange consequences. It moved a little slow, but I thought it was excellent.

253. The Hudsucker Proxy (1994)

June 1, 2014

I'm glad I finally watched The Hudsucker Proxy. My friend Joe practically forced me to watch it by repeatedly showing me a piece of paper with a circle on it and saying, "You know, for kids!" It was a Coen brothers movie, and their movies are always hit or miss for me. Fortunately, this one was a hit. It starred Tim Robbins as an idea man, fresh out of school, looking for a job. He landed one in the mail room of one of the largest manufacturing companies in the country. When the president of the company killed himself, the board members (including Paul Newman) devised a plan to hire an idiot to make the stock prices drop so they could buy them all up for cheap. Robbins was their idiot. They made him the new president and he immediately went to work on his idea, "You know, for kids!" Turns out the circle he drew for kids was actually a hula-hoop, and it created a sensation around the world, making him rich and famous. Unable to follow up his hula-hoop idea with anything of value, and with a nosy newspaper reporter breathing down his neck, Robbins considered following in his predecessor's footsteps by jumping off the building. With a little supernatural help he did not kill himself and he found the inspiration he needed to take back his job as the president and put the board members in their place. It was a lot of fun to watch, and I would definitely recommend it.

252. Snowpiercer (2013)

June 1, 2014

Snowpiercer was an interesting concept. It was probably as good as a movie could be that takes place entirely on a train. Set sometime in the future, after climate change has turned the planet to ice and somehow people had the time and foresight to build a train track that circumnavigates the entire Earth and a massive train with the capacity for thousands of people, stores, swimming pools, and everything else you can imagine. The surviving humans were divided up into class systems, with the richest people up front with all the stores and pools and schools and other good stuff, and the poorest people in back where they were forced to eat processed bug cubes and live in squalor. Naturally, the poor try to rise up and push forward to the front of the train, meeting armies of soldiers with big guns and nasty assassins itching to kill all along the way. With a surprising cast including Chris Evans, Tilda Swinton, Octavia Spencer, Ed Harris, and John Hurt, Snowpiercer was definitely worth watching at least for curiosity's sake.

251. Kill List (2011)

June 1, 2014

Ben Wheatley, the guy who directed A Field in England and Sightseers also directed Kill List, which was easily my favorite of the three. It was a strange tale of a couple assassins who set out to do a job and wind up getting caught in a bizarre occult ritual. It felt like a cross between The Wicker Man and Philip Ridley's Heartless. There isn't a lot I can say about this film aside from the fact that it goes from being a darkly funny movie about two hit-men to a twisted horror film without missing a step, and that makes me happy.

250. A Field in England (2013)

June 1, 2014

A Field in England actually took place on a field in England. A war was raging on the other side of a tree line, and a handful of men who had either deserted or otherwise gotten separated from the war ended up on the field. An alchemist of some sort showed up and forced the men to help him find a treasure that was buried somewhere in the field. They found the treasure and then the alchemist tried to kill the men. I'm not entirely sure what else happened. Some men may or may not have died. Some of them may have been poisoned and then they hallucinated. A coward transformed into a braver man. I think I liked it, but I'm not entirely sure I understood it. So I'll leave it at that. Watch it if you're in the mood for something new and weird.